My Blogging Problem

Hello...is anyone out there? If not, I completely understand; generally a 2 month absence does not fall under the heading of "Brief Blogging Respite." I was worried this would happen when I started my blog last fall. I've never been good at journaling or friendly correspondence. In fact abysmal failure is an appropriate way to describe myself when it comes to returning e-mails, writing family and friends, keeping a journal, recording important dates and milestones for Peter, etc. I even have a hard time with Facebook (the simplest of all mediums).

Let me describe for you my typical thought process when receiving an email:
1) Wow, it's so nice to hear from _____. I love knowing what's happening in ____'s life.
2) I must write _____.
3) Oh, wait. My response needs to be as equally lovely as the original.
4) Crap, I don't have time for that right now—I'll do that later.
5) Hmm...it's 1 week later, I should write _____ back now. Wait, since I rudely have waited a week to respond, it needs to be even better and longer than I planned. Eh, I'll do it later.
6) Crap, crap, crap! Now it's been months and I still haven't responded. Now I have to write a long newsy epistle. It needs to be perfectly crafted with clever wit, insightful observations, amusing anecdotes, and satirical reports on my life. That's going to be difficult. I think I'll do it later.
7) Now, it's been 8 years. It would be embarrassing to respond now. I hate myself.

Yep, basically some variation of the above goes on in my pathetic little mind when faced with recording my life with words. As you can see I have a huge problem with procrastination and perfection. I'm so overwhelmed by my need for perfection that I procrastinate doing anything. But I foolishly thought that the public nature of blogging would apply enough pressure for me to overcome my neuroses (well, at least 2 of them).

Unfortunately, I failed to account for the obvious: numerous people reading my blog would compound the need for perfection, thus sending my procrastination into overdrive. And I also made the foolish mistake of thinking my son would let me within 10 feet of the computer while he's awake. And I didn't realize that my son would become an insomniac forcing me to grab the nearest pillow whenever he actually sleeps, leaving me very little computer time. And I didn't account for the fact that fatigue plus life would leave me in a bit of a melancholic state for several months. Oh well.